Lockdown diary: ‘Life during the coronavirus pandemic has become a horror’

I don’t think there is a single person who hasn’t been impacted by the coronavirus pandemic, except of course coronavirus denialists.

For some of us, it’s been job loss, financial insecurity, losing a loved one or even having Covid-19.

It feels like this is just one long horror movie without a happy reunion at the end.

Day in and day out, I read or write about families and businesses impacted by the pandemic and to be honest, it breaks my heart over and over again.

Just this week, my sister called as I was furiously typing away, telling me that our neighbour of more than 23 years has passed away.

I could hear her voice cracking as she tried to hold it together, and I could hear the sadness emanating from my nieces in the background.

The first person I thought about was our neighbour’s husband who now has to plan a funeral and venture into life on his own.

I count myself lucky that I’m able to safely work from the confines of my home, where the regulations are strictly followed and not a single outing occurs without a thorough spray down and shower upon return.

As if living in fear of an invisible fiend isn’t enough, I feel terrorised. Contact with other people arouses so much fear it’s almost crippling to talk to the anyone even with social distancing in place.

I keep asking myself where this fear comes from. Is it the regulations, the infection rates or the impact of what I’m seeing and feeling?

Just the other day, after writing a piece about how immunity can be lost and that Covid-19 flare-ups may be seasonal, the fear of death invaded my body.

Read more | New study suggests Covid-19 immunity may be lost within months

The realisation that this thing isn’t going anywhere, banished the very little hope I had left.

I now see the virus everywhere, on every surface, in every store, and in everyone.

Life has become a place of horror, every second of every day I’m on red alert for the siren before the commencement of the purge.

It’s been hard to find a glimmer of hope in all that’s happening to everyone, but somewhere in this new normal a silver lining must be found.

Until then, all we can do to survive this long night of terror is to have hope.

Hope that one day we’ll overcome and keep this virus at bay and hope for a better future.

*Covid-19 is keeping many of us indoors. Our shopping trips have become brief, normal activities have been halted. Many have been wondering if they’ll still get their copy of their favourite YOU magazine. And how will we find things to do while indoors?

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