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American actress and singer Hayden Panettiere has been getting candid about the unhealthy habits she adopted to cope with the stress of being in the spotlight.
Hayden (33) has been acting since she was four and later starred in the soap opera One Life to Live.
Before that, she starred in commercials as a baby.
Now, the star is opening up about the stress and pressure that came with spending most of her life in the public eye.
When she turned 22 she started using alcohol as a coping mechanism, she says.
“I was being told how to be and how to live by so many people in my life. I wanted certain decisions to be my own and nobody could stop me,” she said in a recent interview with Women’s Health.
“What I put in my body was like an act of defiance.”
Looking back, the actress wishes she'd chosen a healthier coping mechanism.
“Alcohol might make you feel better in that moment, but it makes you feel so much worse the next day, and then you do it all over again.”
In 2014, she suffered from postpartum depression after giving birth to Kaya, her daughter with ex-boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko.
READ MORE | Hayden Panettiere battling postpartum depression in rehab
At the same time, an old neck injury started acting up again, resulting in Hayden turning to opioids.
It wasn't long before she was hooked on the addictive painkillers.
“My tolerance [for opioids] got so high so fast that it became a problem,” Hayden says.
“I should have gone on antidepressants, but you have to find the right one that works for you. They don’t mix well with alcohol and I wasn’t ready to stop drinking.”
Hayden made the decision to check herself into rehab in 2015 but the treatment wasn't successful and she soon resumed her drinking habit.
By 2018 she'd quit working completely and it was only three years later that she resumed treatment for her addictions.
“I did a lot of work on myself. After eight months of intensive therapy, I felt like I had this blank canvas to work with.”
Since returning to work Hayden recently appeared in the sixth edition of the Scream franchise, set for release on Friday 10 March.
It sees her resuming her role of Kirby Reed which she played in Scream 4 in 2011.
In an interview with Good Morning America, Hayden admitted she didn't know where to start after her four-year acting hiatus.
“When it [Scream] popped up and it came back around I was like, ‘I want to be a part of that again’. I hoped that Kirby was still alive,” Hayden says.
“I willed her back into existence and I called them. When they were doing Scream 5, I was like, ‘Without me?’ I might still be alive and I could come in handy.”
In the same interview, GMA Michael Strahan expressed his condolences to Hayden for the loss of her brother, Jansen Panettiere, who died in February.
A teary-eyed Hayden thanked him, saying: “He’s right here with me.”
According to the medical examiner’s report, Jansen died from an enlarged heart.
The family released a statement confirming his cause of death and thanking the public for their support.
A source close to Hayden has revealed she was inconsolable following the loss of her brother.
The insider also dismissed speculation that his passing might cause Hayden to relapse.
“Jansen was her brother and he was also her best friend. She talked to him every day and he never judged her,” the source says.
“She feels incomplete and broken but she is not spiraling by any means. Hayden is surrounded by so much love and support from her family and friends. No one would allow her to slip, and it is just horrible that anyone would say otherwise.”
SOURCES: WOMENSHEALTHMAG.COM, GOODMORNINGAMERICA.COM, DAILYMAIL.CO.UK
